Twingey: Open Letter to Close Friends

I’m not good at silence. I’m not good at mellow.

I perform them excellently. But, if someone else in such a mood, I must fix the problem. Which is difficult when the problem does not exist.

So, yes. When you’re Mellow, I am slightly distressed. This distress is nothing that I cannot manage. Rather, I should learn to cope and work around – without sounding hyper and perky as I am prone to do when someone needs Fixing.

Which is what the real problem is. I fix people. That’s just what I do. When I cannot fix someone, I am… not at fault… but something along those lines. Somewhat incompetent?

There are people whom I cannot always fix. These people are annoying. Some of them I refuse to be around. Lots of them. Most, actually – I have enough Projects in my life, I don’t need to invite new ones. I can spot them almost immediately. Nonetheless, I keep some around. If I’m keeping you around, then I have reasons. and I’m rather stubborn. I generally like my reasons. So you’re kinda stuck.

So you can apologize all you want for being mellow, that’s okay. That’s a natural response too, much like my maternal twinges of “Must! Fix! Mellow!” You can apologize, I’ll just twinge and go “It’s okay, dear!” You’ve the right to be mellow without my demanding that I be able to fix you.


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